NT Results

The nurse from MFM called today with the results of our NT Scan and First Trimester Screen.  The odds of this baby having Downs Syndrome is 1 in 10,000 and the odds of having Trisomy 18 are 1 in 1,518.  Both numbers are super low so we are very happy with the results!

On a separate note, I think round ligament pain has started today. I can't really get very comfortable.

NT Scan

Things went well today.  I am always happy to see Baby H #2.  I will have the official results on Friday but I think we are in the clear.  The baby was uncooperative so Mr. H and I didn't ask for a gender prediction.  We will find out in a few weeks.  The baby has learned to wave his or her arm, it was super cute to see.  Oh and the little pumpkin has already grown four days ahead of schedule!  I am so excited for the gender scan in 2 1/2 weeks (an elective u/s).  It is hard to believe that we are at that point already.   I have an appointment to have a cerclage placed (a cervical stitch) on January 6th.  Not looking forward to that very much. 

Ultrasound Picture - 9 Weeks and 5 Days

This picture is a little late, this was from our appointment with Maternal Fetal Medicine.  The baby has his or her tiny little arm by the head and I love the smallest little leg and foot ever.  I am sure the baby is much bigger by now (11 weeks and 2 days), it is amazing how quickly babies grow.

11 Weeks

I have slowly but surely made it to 11 weeks! Let the picture taking begin!  As a foreword -- this is my second baby in a year so my belly basically is a month ahead. I actually asked the OB about this last night and he said it is completely normal for any second pregnancy. I haven't gain any weight since the great Thanksgiving weight gain, but had not lost all of the Charlie baby weight before getting pregnant again.  So anyway the pictures ...

Stockings

Mr. H and I put up our stockings this evening.  We also put one up for Charlie.  I was so surprised that I starting crying after.  I really do miss him so very much every day.  I hope that Christmas is better than I think it will be.  It is a very strange feeling, especially since the stockings are so cute and they make me smile, but not having our little man with us is so hard!

10 weeks 2 days

I should really be updating this blog more often.  It is just that being is the most tired part of my pregnancy during the holidays has left me with no time to do much of anything besides sleep, eat and work.  Fitting in things like buying presents online and wrapping them (this hasn't happened yet) is so hard and is taking up all of my extra non sleeping time. 

So a quick update, baby is good so far.  We are 10 weeks and 2 days today! I am still nervous about having bleeding episodes but I am also getting a little excited too! At this time next month we will know the gender of the baby!!  We are still trying to think of names though.

The Chocolate Factory

Today Mr. H. took vacation time and spent the day goofing off and baking Christmas candy that I want to send to my family.  I was originally going to make it myself but being 9 weeks pregnant is starting to take its toll and I get tired so quickly.  Mr. H. helped with cleaning the dishes in between making batches of Peanut Brittle and Peppermint Bark.  He is a spoon licker so there was a lot of washing. 

I am actually taking a break while one of the batches of Peppermint Bark sets, we still have Monster Cookies to make and maybe Rice Krispy Treats but they may wait until tomorrow although I need to mail the package tomorrow so I am not sure when everything will get done. We are starting to feel like we live in a chocolate factory, I am Willy Wonka of course, according to Mr. H that makes him the largest umpa lumpa in captivity.  I really like when spend time doing something together, it really makes me remember why I married him.

No News Is Good News

So things are basically the same.  We did get an ultrasound at the doctors office and there was no blood clot so far! I don't want to get too excited but hopefully the Lovenox is doing its job!!!  The shots are super painful and leave huge bruises but I am glad they are working so far!

My next goal is to make it to the second trimester and get my cerclage placed.  We go to the high risk doctor on December 13th.  I will be happy to see the pumpkin then.  We saw the pumpkin today and he/she has a heart beat of 167!

I am still super tired all the time. I was going to try to do the weekly update but right now I don't know if that will happen yet, mostly because things are basically the same.

I am pretty happy that I only need to get Mr. H. Christmas gifts and I am done shopping!

Traveling

I do not recommend traveling while pregnant.  The plane ride to my parents and the drive to the airport and the return flight were torture! I was so sick! I did have a nice time seeing my mom, sisters and nephews, but traveling was rough (and I came back with a sore throat).

I am looking forward to being on house arrest bed rest for awhile.  Mr. H. was nice enough to go get me a Nintendo Wii to play during my confinement this time. I think I may be a video game champion by the time this baby arrives!

The bad news is that after being off for four days, I have to work all week next week. :(  I also need to start getting back to eating "better". Judging by the groceries Mr. H. bought this week, that may be a little hard. :/

We Saw a Heart Beat!

My ultrasound today was successful! We were able to see the babies heart beating! Honestly it was really hard to see since the ultrasound was trans-abdominal, but we did see it.  The baby is so tiny. Since we didn't get a great picture, they gave us a certificate to come back in two weeks!  I will of course have the ultrasound at my doctors office then but will of course take a second ultrasound!

I have to say that even though the ultrasound place was further from our house than the one we went to see Charlie it was much nicer and the woman who performed the ultrasound was great!  As long as everything goes well we will be going back.  Our repeat visits to this place are now 10% off now!  For some reason this is starting to feel even more real now!

Anxiety

I didn't insist on an ultrasound at my first OB appointment and now I am really regretting it.  I hope to feel a little more confident about this pregnancy once we see a heartbeat.  Mr. H and I decided to go for an elective ultrasound on Saturday.  I feel much better waiting for Saturday than waiting until November 30th to see the heartbeat.  I am sure some of you ladies remember how terrible a two week wait is! What was I thinking?

5 weeks ...

I saw this on another blogs and decided to use it.

How Far Along: I am 5 weeks!  242 days to go.

Size of baby: The baby is the size of an apple seed or .13 inches long. All major organs are starting to form!

Total Weight Gain/Loss: even so far.

Maternity Clothes: I am taking Lovenox shots in my abdomen every day and have a lot of bruising so I have started wearing maternity clothes so that the bruises don't get squeezed all day!

Gender: 10 or 11 more weeks until we will find out.

Movement:  It is too early to feel the baby.  I was 13 or 14 weeks along before I felt Charlie.

Sleep: I sleep all time.  I am lucky to stay awake until 8 or 9. 

What I miss: Eating raw eggs. I made brownies on Saturday and almost ate some of the raw dough until I realized there were raw eggs in it.  I also miss being able to bend over and not have my stomach hurt from all the bruising the Lovenox shots have caused.

Cravings: I am so hungry for Caesar Salad this week but I can't figure out if raw eggs are in the dressing you buy at the store, so I haven't been eating it.  Otherwise, I have been eating sandwiches after heating up the deli meat to kill the bacteria.

Symptoms: Nausea, tired, sore breasts, frequent urination. 

Best Moment this week: Seeing the baby!

Worst Moment this week: Crying because we didn't have bread for French Toast, like actual tears.

Other news: Work has been so busy and we are getting ready to travel for Thanksgiving. it is going to be an interesting trip with all the needles I need for my medications.  It is also the first time we will be traveling with Charlie's ashes.  I feel terrible leaving him home though.

Still Pregnant!

My third beta was this morning. The results came back at 678! So the number is doubling every 35 hours. That seems kind of quick to me (and betabase).  We get to see our little gestational sac on Monday (Nov. 14)! I have also scheduled an OB appt for the 15th because Mr. H. and I are going out of town for Thanksgiving. I am cautiously optimistic that we will end up with a baby we can take home from the hospital this time. I am keeping my fingers and toes crossed though.

On top of all of this exciting baby news, Mr. H. is taking a job interview in NY.  Lets just say we don't live in NY and the firm I work for does not have an office in NY. *sigh*

Second Beta

I had my second beta today! It almost tripled, it went from 21 to 62!!! Mr. H was of course excited too.  Because I had a chemical pregnancy last month, the doctor wants to check the level again on Wednesday (November 9th).

I hope to have my ultrasound before we go away for Thanksgiving.  I don't think I will be able to see the OB before Thanksgiving, but hopefully the week after! It is really important to get to the high risk doctor by 10 weeks and I need to see the OB to get the referral. I am keeping my fingers crossed for a healthy pregnancy this time!

Houston We Are Having A Baby

or at least a positive beta test.  I am 11dpo today and my beta was 21.  I go back on Friday for a second beta. I hope it doubles! We are keeping our fingers and toes crossed!

Non-Baby News

In non-baby related news.  I had Mr. H.'s favorite desk chair re-upholostered as part of my IVF#2, 2ww distractions and it was finally finished this week.  I was very pleased at how it turned out.  At least something useful came out of that cycle.

Before:

After:

Mr. H. is very happy to have his chair back and he says it has more cushioning than it did before. I have an interest in re-upholstering one of our couch's but the chair was pretty pricy so I would have to seriously think about doing a couch.  Although it is a lot of fun picking out the fabrics etc.

IUI and a New 2 WW

We had an IUI today. Wow that was a quick two weeks.  So that means we are officially in the two week wait again! So excited I have a good feeling about this one!

October 15th

Today is National Pregnancy and Infant Loss Day.  Since we lost our son four months ago, this is obviously very close to our heart. We lit a candle at 7 pm.

**As a side note, Charlie is in an urn next to our bed.  I ordered an urn when he was cremated but his ashes wouldn't fit in it.  So we ordered a teddy bear urn.  In the interim, we put him with the Sleep Sheep that he loved to listen to in the womb (the only way I could get him to stop kicking and go to sleep). The teddy bear urn was a logistic nightmare to get.  Mr. H and I decided to take this as a sign that he was happy the way he was.  We keep the teddy bear urn (it is a stuffed bear) with the sheep. **

I wish that this was not such a taboo subject. I find much comfort and peace in talking about Charlie and all the happiness that he still brings me.

News Good and Bad

So I was all ready to upload a picture of my positive home pregnancy test on September 26th (Charlie's due date).  We were so excited because the IVF worked again! Well the beta came in at 38 but we were a few days early so the "real test" was two days later and the beta was 46.  Obviously disappointing but maybe there was still reason to hope!  Two days later (09.30.11) my beta was 30.6.  A chemical pregnancy. I have been beyond disappointed.

We are doing an IUI this month (October) and if that doesn't work (please work!) then we are meeting with a new RE on the 27th to see what he has to say.

We are also seriously considering gestational surrogacy.  Having another baby is going to involve a preventative cerclage (cervix sewn closed) because I delivered Charlie without any labor pains. Another baby also carries the risk of pre-term labor.  I have asked my sister and she has said yes (if we need her).   If you thought IVF was complicated than I don't know how to describe the process that is gestational surrogacy.  It will be so worth it in the end though!  I feel like one way or another we are going to end up with a baby!! Now I know why they say that you have to withstand the rain to get a rainbow.

And  thanks to God for giving me such an awesome sister!

Positive!

I woke up at 4:30 a.m. to use the bathroom and decided to POAS! It was positive and the beta at the RE's office confirmed that we are expecting our rainbow baby!

Not Waiting

I could not wait until Wednesday to have the blood pregnancy test and I changed my appointment to Monday (tomorrow).  Today I went to the bathroom this morning at about 10ish and had a spot of  brown blood.  I walked all over the grocery store though and didn't spot anymore.  I really feel like it didn't happen for us this time.  I am so sad, but trying to stay positive. I am going to have the clinic call my husband tomorrow because if it is bad news I would like to hear it from him since I will be at work.

I am so tense right now, it is crazy.  After the whole sperm sample mix up, we will be going to a different clinic if it didn't work this time.  It is so frustrating because I don't really feel pregnant.  But last time I did IVF (January 2011) I convinced myself it didn't work and it did.  I guess we will know tomorrow.

Tomorrow is also my original due date with Charlie. I hope I don't cry as much tomorrow as I did today. I miss him so much everyday.

POAS Fever!

I am suddenly dying to take a pregnancy test! I am only half way through the two week wait though!  It does not help that www.countdowntopregnancy.com says that I might get an accurate result on Saturday! I don't know if I am excited or nervous about the results.  Aren't hormones great?

Countdown!

I cannot resist the urge to do this  ...


9.17 - 1dpt ..embryo is growing and developing                                                            
9.18 - 2dpt... Embryo is now a blastocyst                                                                      
9.19 - 3dpt....Blastocyst hatches out of shell on this day                                              
9.20 - 4dpt.. Blastocyst attaches to a site on the uterine lining                                        
9.21 - 5dpt.. Implantation begins,as the blastocyst begins to bury in the lining                 
9.22 - 6dpt.. Implantation process continues and morula buries deeper in the lining          
9.23 - 7dpt.. Morula is completely inmplanted in the lining and has placenta cells & fetal cells
9.24 - 8dpt...Placenta cells begin to secret HCG in the blood                                          
9.25 - 9dpt...More HCG is produced as fetus develops                                                  
9.26 - 10dpt...More HCG is produced as fetus develops                                                   
9.27 - 11dpt...HCG levels are now high enough to be immediately detected on HPT    

Embryo Transfer / Two Week Wait Begins

So it has been a loooong weekend.  I had my embryo transfer on Friday (09.16.11) and when my husband and I arrived at the clinic to check in we were told that the IVF Coordinator and Embryologist needed to speak with us. I was terrified because I only had 2 embryos at that point and I was expecting to be told that neither had survived.

We were told that another embryo had actually fertilized that they didn't notice (because it fertilized late).  It was a 5 cell embryo with significant fragmentation, so poor quality.   Last time I insisted on transferring everything I had left and I feel that is the reason that I may have had such a complicated pregnancy.  I had been advised by my OB to transfer only two embryos this cycle, regardless of the RE's opinion.  We declined to transfer the third embryo and ended up transferring one perfect 8 cell minimally fragmented embryo and one 6 cell fair quality embryo.

I have been taking it super easy this weekend and have basically put myself of modified bed rest. I was only advised to rest until yesterday but thought I would extend it to today just to be on the safe side.  My orders from the RE are not to "bounce" my uterus until further notice.  My uterus hasn't been bounced in awhile thanks to this process and Mr. H's need to produce for several tests and then the big day on Friday.

THE TWO WEEK WAIT BEGINS


Now that I am in the dreaded TWW, I am counting the days until I can (cheat) and take a home pregnancy test before my blood test.  I found this chart in January during my TWW and thought it was interesting.  This chart is for a 3 day transfer so it is accurate for my situation. 


9.17 - 1dpt ..embryo is growing and developing                                                            
9.18 - 2dpt... Embryo is now a blastocyst                                                                        
9.19 - 3dpt....Blastocyst hatches out of shell on this day                                                 
9.20 - 4dpt.. Blastocyst attaches to a site on the uterine lining                                          
9.21 - 5dpt.. Implantation begins,as the blastocyst begins to bury in the lining                 
9.22 - 6dpt.. Implantation process continues and morula buries deeper in the lining          
9.23 - 7dpt.. Morula is completely inmplanted in the lining and has placenta cells & fetal cells                                                                                                              
9.24 - 8dpt...Placenta cells begin to secret HCG in the blood                                            
9.25 - 9dpt...More HCG is produced as fetus develops                                                    
9.26 - 10dpt...More HCG is produced as fetus develops                                                   
9.27 - 11dpt...HCG levels are now high enough to be immediately detected on HPT            

I have to call the clinics tomorrow but I expect the blood test at my clinic to be on the 28th.  I am actually going back and forth on whether to test at home.  I didn't last time because I was convinced it didn't work.  Next week is going to be very emotional as Charlie's original due date was the 26th (my mom's birthday too).  I know that the OB wants to know ASAP when I am pregnant again so that I can be referred to Maternal Fetal Medicine.  Since the next baby(ies) have not implanted yet (most likely), I guess I have some time to decide.  I guess it will at least give me something to do/think about while I wait for the blood test day to arrive. 

Egg Retrieval and Fertilization Report

So we had our egg retrieval yesterday (09.13.11) and the initial report was that they retrieved 8 eggs! I was so excited to hear this because this was 2 more eggs than the last retrieval.  The call this morning from the clinic was not great.  Two of the eight eggs were immature and only two eggs fertilized.  Last IVF we had 6 eggs fertilize and 3 made it to the day 3 transfer.   There was some sort of mis-communication with the embryologist about which sample to use.  He obviously used the wrong sample.  I am beyond upset that we only have 2 embryos. I am sort of convinced that we will not have anything by day 3 to transfer.

I am clearly going to have to have a serious conversation with the doctor about how things turned out.  Even if we have a successful cycle, I should of had embryos to freeze.  If this cycle is not successful, we will be asking for a free cycle (not billed to the insurance) due to the fertilization mishap.  I hope that the embryos are still dividing when they call me tomorrow.

Baking and Stims Start

I am been trying to find activities to keep my mind off of the IVF process in order to make the days go more quickly.

So far I have made pizza, chicken and vegetable soup and enchiladas.  I made all of these last weekend and the we just heated them up during the week, the other plus was that we were not cleaning dishes all week.

I think that the most fun part is baking.

Last Monday I made Blueberry Muffins.

Those went so well that I made Banana Nut Bread last weekend.

And today I made Peanut Butter Chocolate Chip Cookies.  So far the cookies are my favorite.

They are all Martha Stewart Recipes.

As for cleaning the carpets over this long weekend. I forgot how tired the lupron make me.  I don't really foresee any extra cleaning happening.

I started the stims today.  No matter how many times I was stuck last time, I was still unprepared this morning for the first poke! It is all for a good cause though.  It has been very hard emotionally, thinking that I should just be delivering Charlie instead of trying for another baby.

Lupron Starts - Finishing Up Projects Before IVF Transfer

So I started my Lupron suppression shots tonight! I can't believe how real this is feeling now!!

I am having some dental work done from a filling that feel out during my pregnancy with Charlie.  The IVF Coordinator told me that all of the Novocaine procedures need to be over by the time I start the stimulation phase on September 3rd! Luckily, I hope to have the root canal finished on the 29th. I am keeping my fingers crossed that everything works out.

I also have plans to do a serious cleaning of my house before the egg transfer. I don't know if that will really happen but hope to devote most of Labor Day weekend to that project.

IVF #2 -- Decision to Try Again and Medication Arrival

We are well on our way to chasing our first rainbow.  I began the birth control on August 5th for our second In Vitro Fertilization (IVF).  Our first IVF in January 2011 was successful but the pregnancy proved to be very complicated and I delivered our little boy at 23 weeks and 3 days.  He lived 17 hours and 22 minutes before passing away in my arms.  My husband and I decided that we owed it to him to continue our dream of having a family.

We received the all clear from the doctor to try again on August 5th and it worked out that it was early enough in my cycle to start the birth control the same day!

Today my IVF medication arrived! We were very excited, but I didn't remember exactly how many boxes and needles you need to make this happen.

I remember last time that after the Lupron injections start, that time really flies so I am hoping that Wednesday arrives quickly! Also, I am stopping the birth control on the 28th, I felt better after stopping them the first time, so I hope to feel more like myself after that part is over this time.